April 2008
Tuesday April 29, 2008
Disaster daydreams and water slides
Posted by: eyoung at 11:11AM CST on April 29, 2008

Our first outing with our first-born six years ago was to JCPenney’s to look for something baby-related. I don’t remember what we needed, but I do remember struggling to get her into the Baby Bjorn. I was a sleep-deprived, inexperienced, terrified new mom. All I could picture was me dropping our newborn onto the hard pavement of the parking lot. From that day on, our hands-free baby carrier was never hands-free when I wore it. I kept one hand beneath her little round Bjorn-covered butt, holding her through the carrier just in case she started to fall through.

The first time I was paged at work by her day care, my imagination jumped to the worst possible scenarios: They’ve lost her. She choked. A fire. She’s been abducted. Never mind that I rationally knew none of these had happened. I could visualize the worst, so a little part of me panicked.

I termed these lapses in rational judgment my new "disaster daydreams," and I still have them. Apparently, having children kicked my imagination into overdrive. It’s like labor changed a channel in my brain to "Trauma: Life in the ER." No matter how calm the rest of me, a little part of me is always, always freaking out.

Slam-bam

On Saturday, during our once-a-year weekend in Wisconsin Dells, my oldest daughter battled a water slide and the slide won. She flipped over in a tube slide and banged her head so hard, I could hear it at the bottom, despite the roar of water and hundreds of shouting children around me. Within seconds, her forehead swelled into a massive, hard, angry lump. Even the lifeguard started crying when she saw it ("Oh my god!" she kept saying, forgetting I could hear her. "Oh my god!"). The lump continued to swell as we were rushed to the waterpark’s on-site EMT.

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Monday April 28, 2008
What do you wish someone had done for you after you had a baby?
Posted by: Janine Anderson at 1:26PM CST on April 28, 2008
Just six months after Baby No. 1 came into our family, my little sister's giving us Baby No. 2.

I want to be sure to give her some things that will help out in those first few overwhelming weeks of new parenthood. Here's my list of things I'd like to give:
1. A real meal, with main dish, sides, bread and dessert.
2. A fancy schmancy pedicure, with trusted babysitting for a few hours.
3. Do all the laundry, all the dishes and whatever cleaning needs to be done.

I know when we first brought the baby home, all I could do was take care of him. Cooking and cleaning? Except for laundry, it all just piled up, and we ate lots of frozen pizza.

What are the best ways to help a new mom?

Friday April 25, 2008
Are you ready for kid No. 2?
Posted by: Janine Anderson at 9:53AM CST on April 25, 2008
When my husband and I were on our honeymoon, walking through the Jardin des Tuileries, he turned to me and said something along the lines of "We can have kids or do this every three years."

About three years later, he turned to me and said "I think I'd like to have kids." We planned our second big cross-Atlantic trip, to Ireland this time.

When we got back, we started planning for the baby adventure. Fast forward two years, and we've now got a 6-month-old son, and no plans for international travel.

This morning, he asked if I was ready to have Baby No. 2.

I laughed. I'd like to get a year behind the last birth and have the first one closer to potty-trained before we set our sights on No. 2.

We're pretty committed to having a second child. I'm the oldest of three, and he's an only child. Now that I'm an adult, I love having siblings. My two sisters are, I kid you not, my best friends.

And, I can see that learning to deal with them prepared me in many ways for dealing with others.

As much as your sisters make you mad, you can't really get away from them. You've got to find a way to work through whatever problem comes up, or you'll spend a long, lonely weekend in your bedroom.

But some days, when I'm particularly sleep-deprived, and the baby's hit a fussy spot, and I've got no one else at the house to rely on, I wonder how on earth we could possibly manage a second little one in the house.

How did you decide how many kids to have (or not have)? Do you wish you'd done something different?

Thursday April 24, 2008
Want a boy ... eat bananas? Mom's diet may play role in whether baby is boy or girl
Posted by: eyoung at 10:42AM CST on April 24, 2008

By LINDSEY TANNER
AP Medical Writer

CHICAGO — Snips and snails and puppydog tails ... and cereal and bananas?

That could be what little boys are made of, according to surprising new research suggesting that what a woman eats before pregnancy influences the gender of her baby.

Having a hearty appetite, eating potassium-rich foods including bananas, and not skipping breakfast all seemed to raise the odds of having a boy.

The British research is billed as the first in humans to show a link between a woman’s diet and whether she has a boy or girl.

It is not proof, but it fits with evidence from test tube fertilization that male embryos thrive best with longer exposure to nutrient-rich lab cultures, said Dr. Tarun Jain. He is a fertility specialist at University of Illinois at Chicago who wasn’t involved in the study.

It just might be that it takes more nutrients to build boys than girls, he said.

University of Exeter researcher Fiona Mathews, the study’s lead author, said the findings also fit with fertility research showing that male embryos aren’t likely to survive in lab cultures with low sugar levels. Skipping meals can result in low blood sugar levels.

Jain said he was skeptical when he first heard about the research. But he said the study was well-done and merits follow-up study to see if the theory proves true.

It’s not necessarily as far-fetched as it sounds. While men’s sperm determine a baby’s gender, it could be that certain nutrients or eating patterns make women’s bodies more hospitable to sperm carrying the male chromosome, Jain said.

"It’s an interesting question. I’m not aware of anyone else looking at it in this manner," he said.

The study was published Wednesday in the Proceedings of the Royal Society B, a British medical journal.

The research involved about 700 first-time pregnant women in the United Kingdom who didn’t know the sex of their fetuses. They were asked about their eating habits in the year before getting pregnant.

Among women with the highest calorie intake before pregnancy (but still within a normal, healthy range), 56 percent had boys, versus 45 percent of the women with the lowest calorie intake.

Women who ate at least one bowl of breakfast cereal daily were 87 percent more likely to have boys than those who ate no more than one bowlful per week. Cereal is a typical breakfast in Britain and in the study, eating very little cereal was considered a possible sign of skipping breakfast, Mathews said.

Compared with the women who had girls, those who had boys ate an additional 300 milligrams of potassium daily on average, "which links quite nicely with the old wives’ tale that if you eat bananas you’ll have a boy," Mathews said.

Women who had boys also ate about 400 calories more daily than those who had girls, on average, she said.

Still, no one’s recommending pigging out if you really want a boy or starving yourself if you’d prefer a girl.

Neither style of eating is healthy, and besides all the health risks linked with excess weight, other research suggests obese women have a harder time getting pregnant.

The study results reflect women at opposite ends of a normal eating pattern, not those with extreme habits, Mathews said.

Professor Stuart West of the University of Edinburgh said the results echo research in some animals.

And Dr. Michael Lu, an associate professor of obstetrics, gynecology and public health at the University of California at Los Angeles, said the results "are certainly plausible from an evolutionary biology perspective." In other words, since boys tend to be bigger, it would make sense that it would take more calories to create them, Lu said.

Still, Lu said a woman’s diet before pregnancy may be a marker for other factors in their lives that could influence their baby’s gender, including timing of intercourse.

"The bottom line is, we still don’t know how to advise patients in how to make boys," he said.

 


Wednesday April 23, 2008
Mom's best advice
Posted by: mlaehr at 11:40AM CST on April 23, 2008

As a child, and later a teenager, I took my mother for granted. I didn't appreciate the sandwiches she made for me. I didn't appreciate the trips to the zoo, beach and amusement park the way I should have. I didn't appreciate the laundry she did for me, or the patience she must have had.

As a mom, I now realize the worth of what she did and the advice she gave me.

Recently, as noted in a previous Mommy Talk post, I'd been outraged at the behavior of my boys at the dinner table. Last Friday I decided to take the night off from cooking and throw a frozen pizza in the oven. My boys gave me trouble about eating PIZZA. Have you ever?

On the phone with my mom while cleaning up the kitchen and completely irritated, she suggests that maybe the boys just weren't hungry yet. She told me to leave their food on the table, and when they later asked for something to eat, I could give them their dinner.

I thought "Yeah, right," but I listened to her anyway.

One hour later, there sat my boys, at the table, eating their pizza and baby carrot sticks. They cleaned their plates and even put their dishes in the sink.

I'm working on a Mother's Day feature story about the advice moms  give us. I want to know about the times you've listened to her, the times you didn't and the times you wish you had. What's the best advice your mother ever gave you?

You can post here, or e-mail me at marci.laehr@lee.net


Tuesday April 22, 2008
Cardiovascular Institute Open House -- Cool trip for kids
Posted by: eyoung at 9:33AM CST on April 22, 2008

My almost-6-year-old wants to be a surgeon when she grows up. She selected this career last year, and has been obsessed with all things hospital-related ever since. She wants to watch hospital shows on TV, look up pictures online, check out hospital books from the library. And she really, really, really wanted to see the inside of an operating room.

On Sunday, she got her chance. We went to the open house at Wheaton Franciscan-All Saints’ new Cardiovascular Institute, 3801 Spring St. My daughter spotted the photo and article in Saturday’s Journal Times and demanded that we go. I wasn’t sure how much we would see, but it was amazing. We got to see a catheterization lab, two operating rooms, nursing stations, patient rooms, ICU rooms and more. She wandered around the rooms, studied monitors, touched a hospital bed, watched a video of an open heart surgery, even handled surgical tools. She met nurses, technicians and doctors. Thanks to Wheaton Franciscan for this awesome educational opportunity for my daughter, and to all the staff who answered our questions and took time to explain their jobs to a 6-year-old.

She’s still talking about it. It was the highlight of her weekend, probably her whole month. Plus, my 4-year-old got to meet Miss Wisconsin -- “Look, she’s a real princess!” -- and eat free treats. So she was happy too.

I just thought it was a really nice thing and was soooo happy she finally got to see an OR. (I had called the hospital a month or so ago asking if they offer tours for interested kids. Second-grade classes go on field trips to the hospital, but otherwise no.)

Do your children have any obsessions? How do you nurture their interests? And where have you had some of your favorite unexpected/unconventional learning experiences?

 


Easy ways to celebrate Earth Day with your children
Posted by: eyoung at 8:48AM CST on April 22, 2008

Trying to raise eco-friendly kids? Today is Earth Day — the perfect day to kick off some eco-friendly family habits. Here are some ideas from various wire services and Web sites, along with a recipe for easy, yummy Earth Day treats (scroll down to bottom). Find more stories about going green here.

Then share your own tips: How are you teaching your children to respect and care for their environment?

START an Earth Day tradition:

• Plant a tree, maybe one for each of your children. Your children can enjoy watching "their tree" grow from year to year.

• Pick up garbage. Visit a playground, park or other place that you frequently visit as a family and clean it up. Make a game of picking up trash: How much can you find?

• Make a trip to one of Racine’s secondhand stores. See what gently-used treasures you can find in terms of children’s books, clothes and toys. Explain to your children that buying used items can save both resources and money.

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Monday April 21, 2008
Janine? I think the baby just pooped.
Posted by: Janine Anderson at 1:02PM CST on April 21, 2008
That's what my mom said to me as I was eating my salad in a rare two-hands-free moment. She and I had gone to Geneva, Ill., for a wedding shower on Saturday. We had a happy baby along for the day, and he was playing in a little activity center thing-y right behind me.

My mom had turned around to look at him and his eyes were all red and he had that pursed-lip look we've come to associate with a poop. I put down my fork and pulled him out of the seat.

There was poop on the blanket behind him, and oozing up out of his pants, covering the back of his little outfit.

"I'm going to need some help here, Mom," I said.

She took one look at the baby's backside and got up to come along. Diaper bag in hand, we made it to the women's restroom and -- no changing table.

We stood the baby up on the counter (with help... he's only 5 1/2 months, so no standing on his own) and started stripping him down. Pants, socks, onesie, diaper cover, diaper. Everything went into a plastic bag, and the baby went into one of the two sinks.

My mom ran water in the other sink, getting it ready for an impromptu bath. At this point, that was the only way he was getting clean.

I popped him in and scrubbed him off, turning the water a lovely shade of mustard yellow. Then, out he came, and back into the other sink for a good rinse.

We dried him off with a flannel receiving blanket and then moved over to a padded bench for the re-dressing. Diaper, diaper cover, one-piece outfit, and he's ready to go.

By the time I got back, the salad plates were gone, and I had a covered plate of chicken and pasta left at my place.

We've had a few memorable explosions. Usually, the diaper ones happen at home. I think this is the first real disaster we've had while out and about.

What's the worst outing disaster you've had? How did you deal with it?

Thursday April 17, 2008
A little dinner music?
Posted by: mlaehr at 7:25PM CST on April 17, 2008

My dad ruled the dinner table with an iron fist.

OK, that's a bit of a stretch, but he didn't put up with shinanagans - AT  ALL. No burping. No slopping food around. No singing at the table. No yucky stories or jokes. Finish your milk and peas. Say please pass the potatoes. Talk, laugh, share, eat.

I made the decision at about age 10 that I would allow my children to sing at the dinner table. I was going to be more relaxed. I envisioned happy meal times with no one crying over spilled milk.

Now I'm the one crying.

My 6 and 4-year-old boys are out of control at the table. No amount of threats, sending them to their rooms or making them sit in time out while the rest of us eat has made a difference.

Almost every night someone spills their milk. Almost every night they have to be reminded more than once to sit down. Almost every night someone refuses to eat something on their plate. Almost every night someone has to be reminded to keep their food on their plate.

Even the nights my husband isn't home, we sit and eat together. Almost every night the dinner table is full of more yelling than talking.

The meal usually starts out with little reminders: "Please turn around in your seat and eat over your plate." or "You have to eat your corn, so please stop trying to sneak it onto your brother's plate."

A few minutes later, I'm nearly at the breaking point: "I have asked you three times to sit down. If you get up again, you will go up to your bedroom while the rest of us finish dinner!"

When I've finished eating, fed the baby and cleaned her high chair, my patience is usually gone: "Get in time out! You will finish everything on your plate or you will have nothing else to eat until breakfast! I AM NOT GOING TO ARGUE WITH YOU!"

Manners? I thought if dinner were relaxed and happy with good food and maybe even a song or two, manners could still be taught. Am I wrong? Do all children this age act this way at dinner? How do you teach a 4-year-old to keep his napkin in his lap when he spends half of dinner standing on his chair? 


Wednesday April 16, 2008
What do you pay your baby sitter?
Posted by: eyoung at 2:41PM CST on April 16, 2008

What's the going rate around here for baby sitters (casual babysitting vs. an in-home day care)? A quick search of local sitters on SitterCity.com finds sitters who charge $5/hour all the way to $15/hour -- quite the range.

What do you pay your sitter?


Monday April 14, 2008
Mommy Talk: What does a mom do when her arms are free again?
Posted by: eyoung at 9:50AM CST on April 14, 2008

"You should carry me now because soon I won’t want you to carry me anymore."

The sage advice comes from my oldest daughter, who is almost 6 but still loves it when I carry her upstairs to bed or carry her downstairs in the morning. At 36 pounds — technically not even heavy enough for her booster seat — I can easily lift her into my arms and take her where we want to go. She especially makes this request on days when we haven’t had enough "snuggle time," as she’s termed it. ("We didn’t get time to SNUGGLE! You need to carry me!")

I oblige.

My youngest daughter turned 4 two weeks ago. I still carry her around, too. Not all the time, of course. But when the opportunity presents itself, I’m quick to accept. I carry her from the car into her day care center. I carry her back to the car when her day is done. And I usually carry her into her sister’s school, as the parking lot has been treacherous, icy, flooded — no place for skipping in pink sparkle shoes.

My youngest is only 32 pounds. I could toss her in the air if I wanted to. But I don’t want to. I want instead to carry her. To have her wrap her little legs around my waist, her little arms around my neck. I want her to bury her face into my shoulder so I can protect her little cheeks from the wind and the cold.

And when my girls are tired or crabby or just plain worn out from the world, nothing comforts them like being scooped up and held against my chest.

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Saturday April 5, 2008
I'm so angry ...
Posted by: mlaehr at 1:56PM CST on April 5, 2008

...I can barely even type this.

Saturday late morning is clean up day around our house. I do the laundry, the dishes, vacuum, etc. My boys, 6 and 4, have the task of cleaning their basement toy room.

Every Saturday it's a fight. I've gotten so frustrated in the last few weeks that I've set the timer on the microwave. If the room isn't cleaned up in 1 hour, they are grounded from the room and the majority of their toys for a week.

Today I told them I wasn't going to fight with them. I was just going to set the timer, and they had better clean up.

About an hour ago, I was vacuuming the living room when my 6-year-old came upstairs and sheepishly told me something was wrong with the TV in the playroom. When I asked why he was turning the TV on instead of cleaning up, he didn't answer.

I went downstairs to discover that the small flat screen TV we spent $500 on for them was smashed. Literally, the screen was smashed.

The TV was their joint present from Santa. My husband and I, in the weeks before Christmas, kept the boys out of the playroom by telling them the carpet had been cleaned and was wet. We painted the walls in bright colors, hung shelving, painted a blackboard and bought colorful storage baskets for all their stuff.

On Christmas Day we left a note by their stockings to go downstairs to find their presents. They were so excited. They ran from one end of the room to the other, pointing out stuff to each other. (Previously the room had white walls, our old furniture and baby toys mixed on the floor with the stuff they actually played with.)

I'm not just angry about the TV, I'm mostly angry because my boys don't seem to appreciate anything.

I sent them to their rooms. I can't look at them right now. And I can't even begin to imagine what punishment would fit this crime.

Do I bag up all their toys and donate them? Do I ground them from TV for a month?

P.S. The toy room is still a mess.

-- Marci

  


Thursday April 3, 2008
Baseball with baby? Home run!
Posted by: Janine Anderson at 12:57PM CST on April 3, 2008

Last week I asked for tips about breastfeeding my little guy at Miller Park. I got all kinds of responses, from the go-ahead-and-do-it-anywhere crowd, to those who thought it would be best for us to find a private place to take care of meal time. There were even some who thought that wasn't the proper place to bring an almost-5-month-old.

When Saturday rolled around, we bundled the baby up in a nice warm jacket, packed a bag with all the necessities (cloth diapers, an extra cover, some disposables, two changes of clothing, a book and a few toys and our brand new baby carrier), and headed to the ballpark.



We got into the park as they were announcing the line-ups. We got to our seats quickly, and settled in for some baseball. The baby was great. He was happy and engaged, looking around at all the new stuff. The one diaper change we needed to do went smoothly. Miller Park's got great baby changing tables. They're metal, easy to clean, big enough to set your diaper bag on, and have raised edges on all three sides, so the risk of baby rolling off is quite small.

After that, it was time for him to eat. We had seats on the aisle, and I wore a nursing shirt. I don't think anyone other than my husband had any idea that I was feeding the baby, though his feet did stick out into the aisle just a little bit. If we hadn't had the aisle seats, there's no way I would have been able to nurse him in our seats. His feet would have been in someone's lap. But it was nice. I actually got to pay attention to the game for the 10 minutes he was eating. Afterwards, he conked out.

We decided to leave after the sixth inning. It took a little while to get everything ready to go and the little guy fussed for a tiny bit while we were strapping him onto Dad's back for the first time. Once he was secure, though, the baby loved being in the carrier. Especially when Dad gave little jumps. It was quite the giggly walk.

Would I do it again? Absolutely. Though it'll be harder to cough up the money for full price tickets. We won't be sitting in the first deck again for a long time.

 


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